We had a possible job opportunity come up or perhaps I should say a possible job opportunity ended this past week. I was actually quite excited about it. The job, not the ending.
What really got me was the rejection. Not by the church for not hiring us. I felt rejected by God. We aren't on the first trek of this journey since leaving our full time church job 18 months ago. We have had ups and downs, clarity and confusion, all of it. And you could say our hopes were a little high on this one.
After I found out I couldnt sleep. I just began to question God, "What are you doing?" Why did you call us out in the first place? Why won't you restore the blessing of being back in a church to us?
It pretty much sounded like I was throwing a temper tantrum in my bathroom.
But then God gave me a perfect picture of where I am. We just got back from a 14 hour round trip car ride with a 1 year old who had two teeth trying to break thru by the time we got back. At one point she had woken up from her nap and wanted to get out of the car seat restraints so bad. But we had about 30 more minutes to go before our next stop. It breaks your heart when your little kid is crying and so upset because they dont understand what's going on. If they only knew that in just a moment or two things would be better. You were taking them to a great place they were going to enjoy but they just had to wait a little bit longer to get there. Kids dont understand trips. They dont get the passage of time and travel. They dont comprehend the journey until they have experienced it or have a little more wisdom under their belts. Then they can grasp what is going on.
It doesnt matter how i look at myself or what I have achieved or been a part of, I am one of God's kids and I truthfully I dont get this journey. But I do know who is in control and I do know He has a plan and a purpose for my family.
So i am going to sit back and enjoy the ride. The stop is coming soon enough.
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